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September 07 2011, Lee Davy
The previous couple of months has been a whirlwind of excess. After the inevitable outpouring of money that Las Vegas instills in you I returned to the shores of the united kingdom and changed into Egon Ronay and again the fault lay with Las Vegas. Throughout the World Series of Poker (WSOP) I spent more time dining in top restaurants than I did playing. My rather fortunate streak of continual winning sessions in bank card roulette allowing me the chance to pretend to be loaded. I DISCOVERED it difficult to settle back in to the united kingdom way of living after six weeks of debauchery and so I MADE UP MY MIND fuck it. I CAN continue to party and would just pretend I USED TO BE still in Las Vegas. So I closed my eyes and imagined that Wigan, Southport and Ogmore Vale was Jaleo, Naked Fish and Koi and enjoyably did my bollocks.It all needed to end one day and on my train ride back to the Valleys I USED TO BE sat wondering how I USED TO BE going to fill my bank vault back up with cash after I received an e-mail from the Editor of WPT Poker Magazine Mr Jon Young. Young wanted me to move right down to Cardiff where the heats of Late Night Poker were being filmed so I’LL write a work in regards to the history of the show. Working for WPT Poker Magazine was a brand new work stream and one I were looking to swim into since I left the railways. So happy as Larry I jumped into my little Mini Cooper and headed for Enfy studios in Cardiff.I had never been to a television studio before and was confused since the address said Enfys Studios were on an Industrial Estate in Splott. I had lived in South Wales for 24-years so how had I not noticed a massive television studio on an industrial estate in Splott? After I eventually found it I realised why I had missed it up to now. Enfys studios aren’t any bigger than the shed in my Dads garden that contains fresh air and a spade to throw the dog shit from the grass and into the river. I parked up, grabbed my rucksack and headed into the shed. Outside of the studio were a couple of benches of the kind you might find in a lager garden and there has been what seemed like a burger van. I later realised the burger van was actually the food catering truck so I saved a couple of blushes by not asking them for 1 / 4 pounder with cheese.Vicky Coren was standing outside speaking to another lady I later learned was called Megan. I MAY hear her rather posh voice blurting out streams of words in between sucks and puffs of smoke. James Akenhead was walking around behind her. He was also killing himself slowly, only stopping to flick the ash from the top and to continue playing on his cell phone. I had never talked to Vicky before so I made a beeline to James who I had met during WPT Bratislava. He shook my hand and said hello before returning to his game.“Sluice,†I said pointing to the array of letters at the bottom of his mobile.“Top man,†said Akenhead.I walked into the studio and the primary person I saw was a tender woman with a collection of cans on her head who was holding a clip board. If she wasn’t a part of the production team I MIGHT let the following girl I slept with put her finger up my bum and poke around to seek out that magic gland everyone tells me about. I introduced myself to her, and my anal canal remained un-penetrated, as she told me she worked as a part of the production team. She showed me where the fairway room was and a tender lad, who was a runner, made me a cup of tea. I looked across the green room, which was black and red and never green at all, and there have been about 50% of individuals I knew. I MADE UP MY MIND to begin grabbing one of the vital players and that i took them outside for a five minute chat about LNP. I MIGHT record the conversations and use the fabric to put in writing my article.The first person I grabbed was Ross Boatman. I told him that I wrote for the Hendon Mob website (something I say to all the Mobsters) and he said he recognised me which after all was a lie. I remember the primary time I saw Barny Boatman at EPT Vienna. I USED TO BE so sure that he would know me because I wrote at the Hendon Mob website so I introduced myself to him and he kept calling me Davy all day. Day after today he stopped calling me Davy which was a relief until he started calling me Daniel instead. I like it when people call me kid or oh you rather than guessing. And where the fuck does Daniel come from anyway? Surely I GLANCE more like a Bruce or a Jackie than a Daniel?I met James Dempsey for the primary time and the lad is a live wire. He’s excellent fun to be around, always stuffed with jokes and taking the piss out of his mates. He also is useful if you want to the touch up your make up on the last minute since you can use his head as a mirror. Dempsey was having a chinwag with John Tabatabai. I LIKE John Tabatabai but just wish he would have a sex change and get married because I hate typing Tabatabai all the time. Fuck it…I will call him Tabby for brief. Tabby is simply too sharp and too handsome. He also has a larger entourage than Nelly. There are such a large amount of people around him it’s ridiculous, including this huge, your gonna get your fucking head kicked in form of bloke called…get this…Chuckles! Tabby always looks as if he could open a series of stores where he teaches young lads learn how to dress, walk and talk to allow them to sleep with sexy sirens. Maybe this is the reason he keeps getting knocked out of Late Night Poker heats so early, the lad just has bigger things on his mind.Padraig Parkinson was there and incredibly he was drinking a cup of tea but I couldn’t find Liv Boeree, Andrew Feldman or Richard Ashby so I DETERMINED to seek out the web qualifier Luke Davies. Have you tried finding an unknown online qualifier in a room of individuals you don’t know and feature never met? Well it’s incredibly easy. Just find the child wearing a baseball cap and dressed like a Scouser and you have got him. To be fair to Luke it wasn’t as though he was going to look on TV, on one of the crucial prestigious TV tournaments within the world, for his first ever time, to take a look at and earn $150,000. A TV shows his Mum, Dad and all of his family and friends would proudly watch…how I forgot…he was!Thank God for Liv Boeree who doesn’t even use transport to get to events like this. She is so sexy, gorgeous and incredibly talented that she beamed herself right into the center of the set similar to that other vixen Uhura. Boeree was dressed to kill, looking stunning and clearly got the memo telling her that the entire world was watching, the person who Davies obviously didn’t receive.One last quick glance across the green room – that wasn’t green – and that i found Chufty, who wasn’t looking very Chufty in any respect. Rumour had it that the soon to be Prime Minister (in line with Channing) had prepared for this event like a real pro, he had played cash games in London all night and caught the primary train right down to Gods country with no need any kip for 24-hrs. To mention his interview was short and sweet is slightly understated.That left Feldman. I had met Feldman in WPT Bratislava and that i could tell he was like marmite, but I liked him. I said hello, wished him good luck and stale he trotted to play. He was excited and whole of enthusiasm after his recent GUKPT Luton final table. That excitement started to fade as he sat down on the table and started riffling his chips.“So why does everyone hate you then?†Came a voice from one of the crucial players on the table.Lee Davy will also be reached at lee.davy@btopenworld.com or through his website, www.leedavy.co.uk. You’ll be able to follow him on Twitter at @chingster23.
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